I remember when Facebook was still new and they added a new relationship option - it's complicated. I thought to myself I hope that never applies to me. I am thankful that in all the ways I use to describe my married relationship I would never choose It's Complicated even though it can be. I think many of our relationships are complicated because we are complex individuals. If you can remember all the way back to either Middle or High School biology and the discussion of cellular biology there are organisms that are only 1 cell, versus our estimated 30 trillion (30,000,000,000,000.) We are complex and think lots of thoughts and it's hard to think of ourselves as just one thing.
We each have lots of ways to describe ourselves but I strive to make 1 primary, child of God. I am reminded that God calls us children - not because we are immature but that we have room to grow. We do not always get it right and have to practice, practice, practice. Our Psalm reading for this morning is from 119, versus 114-17:
You are my refuge and shield : my hope is in your word.
Away from me, you wicked! : I will keep the commandments of my God.
Sustain me according to your promise, that I may live : and let me not be
disappointed in my hope.
Hold me up, and I shall be safe : and my delight shall be ever in your statutes.
Like a hen gathers her brood, O Lord : shelter us under your wing.
God is the hen who gathers us up and shelter us under God's wing. And we need it because it's complicated. I know there is conflicting information and everything has some spin on it but we do know for sure some things. God loves us and claims us as God's own. God has reached out to us over and over again so that we might know that love. God has met our confusion, skepticism, fear and anxiety that we are God's own.
Today, I should be at Annual Conference with clergy and laity from all over our conference. And yet I am at home, participating in the Clergy Session from home. Our Bishop is leading via a Zoom broadcast so we can vote on those retiring and those who are entering in ministry. It was nice having Memorial Day off for the first time in a long time but it's complicated trying to figure out how to do new things. We are watching some colleagues struggle to participate and voting. Josh and I were using the same computer when it became clear that for voting purposes we needed to separately login. Hoping our internet keeps up with dueling devices.
I do not have all the answers, I will get things right just as I will get things wrong. My biggest fear is that my decision could hurt someone and second to that disappoint someone. I am clinging to the promises in our Psalm today that God is my shield & refuge, that my hope can be found in God's word, that I will keep the commandments of my God and trust that God will lead us.
God lead us and guide us in these complicated times so that we will keep your commandments in all that we do, through Christ our Lord, we pray, Amen.